Terrible news. You are no longer a Creative Director. No longer a Copywriter, Art Director or Suit.

But the bright side, you have a new hat. Baseball cap, actually. Your new hat says, “AdCracker.” Yet advertising is just one of the tools you use.

Here’s the deal. Clients come to you because they think they need ads. But what they really need are solutions, creative solutions to problems like these:

- Get a new product off to a great start.

- Polish the corporate brand, improve or change their reputation. Or the reputation of a product.

- Sign-up more customers.

- Get more business from the customers they have.

So identify your client’s “real problems.” Then crack those problems with innovative, off-screen ideas. Some areas to explore:

> Video and photos of offScreen examples R

Think of new ways for customers to experience the product or service.

- A stockbrokerage firm might open an Investment Cafe.

- A cosmetics company might modify a van into a product demonstration and sales vehicle. It could travel to malls, public fairs, even schools.

- A breath mint might include free samples with romantic video rentals.

Think of different channels of communication.

- Hire people who will walk around town with your logo or sales message printed on their foreheads or T-Shirts. Or on their cars.

- And if that’s to ba ba ba boring, how about custom labeling bottles of chili sauce for your sales force to give away, if you do in fact have a hot new product.

- How about joint promotions or ad campaigns with other companies? A company that sells bottled mango juice ran a promo with a large distributor of fresh mangos. They placed a small sticker on each mango sold through retail stores. "Bottled version available from Juicy Juices."

- Or say you have a Web site that sells prescription drugs. Is there a way to use drugs to sell your Web site? Perhaps a mailer, a plastic drug bottle that says "Inside: 3,406 drugs for less." Open it, and there's a brochure, along with a discount offer on the first purchase.

Think about sex.

- Very good.

- Now back to work.

Think of ways to use existing channels of communication.

Start by looking at all the ways the company currently interacts with customers and prospects: through their billing department, sales and customer service staff, as well as product packaging. Then consider ways to use these existing channels to turn current customers into better customers. To get referrals from them. Or Or strengthen loyalty.

- Include inserts with the product.

- Provide sales people with special promotions, literature, and mailers. Perhaps email letters and special offers they can send to prospects.

- Perhaps the billing department can promote a customer referral program with statement inserts, and the customer service department can do the same while talking to customers.

Think of events you could stage or co-sponsor.

- A marathon, golf or tennis tournament.

- Concert, rock or classical. Big or small.

- A party. Fiesta. Dance contest.

- Educational seminars or classes. Perhaps on the Internet. Featuring helpful "How to” information.

Think of different media.

- MP3 downloads, podcasts, Web video.

- Create a set of collectibles, such as custom designed stamps or stuffed toys.

- Take a look at an advertising specialties catalog, for such things as customized umbrellas. "Talk to me about storm insurance."

Think of ways to link to the news.

- You can always link to a seasonal event such as Chinese New Year, Christmas, Ramadan, or back to school.

But do so in a fresh way. Avoid the tired old, “celebrate the new year” type of theme by giving your ad a twist, something of interest.

TVC visual track: Mr.Wong, smiling, answers the phone, just says, "Yes, we can take you," and hangs up. This happens time and time again, as the phone rings immediately after he hangs up.

TVC voice over: “Chinese New Year Won’t Be The Same For The Wong Family This Year, Thanks To Their New Toyota Maxi Van.”

Or look for an event that is more original. Like the rainy season. A blue moon. Or the anniversary of Neil Armstrong’s first step on the moon.

Link your ad to a topic currently in the news, perhaps fringe news.

“We’re here at the Star Trek Convention to demonstrate our advanced online banking services.”

"Arabs and Jews both agree: our chocolate bars are the best. Whew!"

Link your ad to a person in the news.

Some years ago, a highly successful executive at one of the major automobile makers, John DeLorean, decided to launch his own car company.

Unfortunately, he ran low on cash and was caught selling a huge amount of cocaine. A week after his conviction, one of the companies selling this guy's car ran an ad headlined, "Buy a new DeLorean and get five pounds of coke free." The photo in the ad showed one of the shinny new cars next to several packs of Coca Cola.

Things to think about:

- Sex is always good to think about. And a fountain of creative energy, driving the Id in a struggle with your Ego and Super-Ego.

- Who could you do cross-promos with?

Example, a woman's lingerie maker teamed up with a chain of hotels to offer a prize drawing. The headline read, "Put this bra on and you could be taking it off in one of New Zealand's best hotels." Which proves, once again, that clever offers can involve strange bedfellows.

Example: A fruit drink company put stickers on fresh mangos and papayas distributed to stores with the message, "Just as fresh as Annisa's Juice." So how about a distributor or manufacturer for a promo partner?

- Take the product to the people, in an unexpected way.

Example: to demonstrate that its off-road SUV was waterproof, a car company placed a new model in a mall, and filled it with water and fish, turning it into an aquarium.

- Re-design the product to match trends in consumer behavior. "Finally, a cheese engineered for snacking."